Fostering set of 2 -- Hangin' on!

Where in the world do I start?  I kind of left everyone hanging and probably wondering what is happening in the Bowers home since taking in the two new foster children.  So------ now for the nitty gritty.  My sweet little 10 year old boy is something else!!  You see about 2 weeks ago I stopped by his old school to TRY to get someone in the office to talk to me about this little guys behaviors.  I thought I would have to beg and plead but no….they ushered me right in and even found someone to watch my two little girls for me why we sat behind a closed door for 1 HOUR!!!! She spilled the beans on everything!!!! I have to say that I am so happy I didn't know this garbage before we got him -- I'm not sure if I would have taken him.  I told him that I visited his old school and had a very interesting conversation with his old principle.  He was not happy!! He said I had no business talking to her.  

I have never seen anything like it.  He has been terrorizing the children at the school. He's been threatening people with knives and saying some pretty spooky things we was going to do with them.  The next day he actually brought the knives to school and chased the kids with an open blade. This poor little boy thought he was gonna die that day.  His language is deplorable!!! His comments are X rated and shocking. No wonder why he was upset that talked to his principle!  This is a 10 year old boy!!! This does give you a birds eye view on how chaotic his life was at his last home without even being there or witnessing it.

Within the first week of him being here at our home -- he and his sister ran away.  The children are able to have visitations with their mom and dad twice a week.  The mom told this little guy to run to a persons house that is by ours ( a few miles away) and once they are there they will come and get them and head to Texas. The boy told the mom that his sister would not be able to keep up with him so the mom actually brought a scooter so the little girl would have wheels to get away on.  I found them around the block and yelled at the top of my lungs "YOU BETTER GET YOUR BUTT IN THIS CAR NOW!!!!"  They both ran toward my car for all they were worth.  Thank goodness they are 6 and 10.  Any older and they would have ran for their lives away from me. 

Once we got home I was fuming.  I do believe smoke was coming out my ears.  I do think it is amazing how these little bodies can bring out such an ugly side of me. Anyway-- Once we got home like I said I was fuming!!! This little boy was mouthing off to me.  Saying everything that would just get me madder.  It didn't take me long to realize that I just needed to send this little boy to bed for the night.  If he would have stayed up I would have been tempted to lay my hands on this boy in away that DHS would not approve so I had to get him out of my sight for the time being.  While he was in his room I did go through the backpack that he had on his back (THAT I BOUGHT HIM I MIGHT ADD!!) Once I looked inside the backpack my heart started to get soft and I started to calm down immediately.  I thought I would find things that he would have stole from the house but what I found was not what I thought I would find.  When I opened his backpack I found all of his sisters clothes that he packed for her very neatly.  I had just bough him over $100 in new clothes but hardly anything was for him. It was all for his sister.  Then I found the one thing that almost made me cry.  One of my boys gave him a bible.  There it was -- in his backpack.  Forget his toys, books,  and everything else -- he chose to take the bible that was given to him.  My heart was  mush!! I must talk to this little boy.

I went into his room and he was sobbing in his pillow.  He said "I just wanted to be with my mom".  I lost it!!! These poor little kids have to pay this price because of parents bad decision!!! All the anger that I felt before and the frustration -- well that was gone.  Now it was compassion and trying my best to reach this boy.

Once this incident happened his leash got a lot tighter.  We could not leave him alone with the other children alone for any amount of time, our back gates needed to remain locked, he could not play out front -- only in the back yard where we could visibly see him.  As a few weeks past I could see him starting to relax a little bit.  He would get these smiles that just bless my soul.  He smiles so big his eyes close.  It is so adorable!  I could tell that regardless of these stunts he would pull I was gradually getting attached to this little guy and determined to make a difference in his little life.

So last week I got a call from the school because he got a referral.  He called someone a Mother *****.  He lost all his recesses for a couple of days.  As discipline from us -- he was grounded from his skateboard and he lost his computer time and an early bed time.  He is already on an expulsion contract from his old school because of his deplorable behavior.  They said one more incident and he will be expelled.  So from that time till yesterday he had been really good even at school.  His teachers said he is a model student who does very well and he has not given them any problems even from the time I enrolled him in school while in the classroom.

However yesterday we took several steps back.  From the moment he stepped on the school bus he starting to pick on Joshua (my son).  The other kids were defending Joshua and he was spitting out words.  Then on the playground he was overheard saying he was going to beat Joshua up.  Then in the lunchroom (eating breakfast) he used the "F" word about 20 times.  All these incidences happened before 9am in the morning.  So he is home with "yours truly" today.  He will be writing an apology letter to the principle today.  We had him give his skateboard back to his mom.  That is not welcome in our home until he shapes up.  We will let her know when he can have it back. Also I am getting him counseling.  First thing on Monday we will be in a councilors office.  This little boy is miserable, broken, angry and so sweet all at the same time.  He has been really good at the house for the past three weeks, really good in his classroom = he behaves well with monitored times. So I am trying to work with the school and maybe for a period of time he can eat his lunch in the office, spend recesses in the classroom or in the office and so on until we see a shift in his behavior.

Please pray for this little guy! The Lord loves his children.  This little boy loves to read the bible and loves Jesus.  I know the Lord can transform his life.  Oh!! and pray for us too!!! For patience!!!!  Thanks!!!