Adoption: First Week

The day after these kids arrived we went on a family camp in Bandon Oregon at Lake Bradley for 4 days.  I was wondering if this was going to be one big mistake or would this be a great experience for everyone.  I thought it might be good and a good ice breaker for Alicia and Miss J.

I didn't know if I was going to be able to handle the two little ones not knowing how they were and what their issues were.  Well I can say that the Lord knows what he is doing.  He planned all the events that took place and will take place in the future.  You would think I have learned by now not to question things.

All the way over to Bandon the little ones were saying swear words.  I would say "no -- we don't say that -- we say shoot."  I was shocked at what I was hearing.  These two little one's crack me up!  They are their own source of entertainment.  A comedy act really.  They seem so adult like with their little hand on their hip and their finger waiving in front of them as they say "I don't have to put up with this!" or "whatever!" or ".....awkward!"  We have plenty to laugh at when they are with us.  Oh my!! We must have needed more laughter in this house.

Miss J is very quiet right now.  She only speaks to adults when spoken to.  She won't look Milford or myself in the eye right now. She is very compliant, loves children, she is so good to Joshua and the other children.  I believe she is this way right now because she is scared and unsure of us and our family.  By looking at her Facebook she is completely different than what we are seeing right now.  I can tell that she is a girl that was left to her own devices.  I do believe that will change too as her life with be pretty miserable if she continues on living that way specially for the consequences that she will have.  I am so glad she is here.

I was pleasantly surprised that at family camp Alicia and Miss J wrote a song for the talent show.  The words were about reading Gods word and how it talks about how he loves us.  They sang the song in front of everyone!!!!!!!!! I was so proud and encouraged that Miss J does know the Lord. We just need to shelter her from those outside influences that are corrupting her.  Pray for her please!!!!!!!!!!!

For little M and little K -- it is so evident that they got their way too many times.  They are snotty to each other and when you correct them they will yell back at you.  Sorry -- not happening here! Time out is getting very popular.  I put Miss K in time out and she started inflicting pain on herself.  I thought for sure she was going to stop anytime but she kept slamming her hand on the hard floor.  Her hand was really red.  Finally I sat in front of her and held her hand in mine while in time out as she tugged and pulled to get away.  After she sat there I asked if she was going to be good and she said nodded her head "yes".  She gave me a hug and said "love you momma". I told her we don't hurt our selves.  We use our hands to hug and to pet things and to be soft.  We don't use our hands to hurt ourselves or other people.  She said "okay" and has not done it since but I am sure I will see it again sometime.  

It has taken them 4 days to learn that when I say "if you do that again you will go in time out" I am completely serious.  They now answer me right away and say they will be good.  If I ask them if they are going to be good while in time out and they choose not to answer me -- I say "okay you can stay there" and I walk away for 5 more minutes.  I come back and ask the question again.  If they ignore me I just say the same thing.  We had to repeat this but now when I ask them a question in time out they answer me when I ask it.  

I have a feeling that one girl was favored over the other.  Miss K (5) tells me how her foster mom hurt her.  She wet the bed and looked at me with these big eyes and asked "is she going to find out?" I reassured her that she will not find out and she is not getting spanking for wetting the bed.  She has said others things that kills me to her but then so happy they are with me so I can love all over them!!! The Lord is good.

This cluster of siblings have been placed in our home for foster care.  There is one homestudy that is in the works that is a family member that lives in California.  There is a small chance that they might go there if they are approved.  From my understanding DHS thinks this will fail.  If this fails there is no other family to contact so we would be able to adopt.  Please pray for us as we blend together.  Please pray for Miss J -- she is having just a really hard time.