Adoption: Transition day 1

In these next post that I write -- because these kids are in forster care I can not use their names or post pictures of their faces for their protection.  So just no that as you read on.

I got a call from the state saying they were just around the corner with the kids.  I ran as fast as I could to my husband saying to him we need to go outside and be there when they pull up into the drive way. My knees were knocking and I was so nervous! I had never experienced this before.  These poor kids were just taken from their relative placement unwillingly.  This would be the seventh placement these kids have had in their young age. The kids didn't see why they were being taken -- they loved her!

The van pulls into the drive way.  These two precious little ones get out of their booster seats and they came over to me.  No smiling faces and tears streaming down their cheeks.  They both came right up to me and held my hand.  "Little M" who is 4 years old wears glasses and she has these dimples that are so irresistible asked "are we staying with you?"  I bent down and said "yes you are and I so happy you are here!"  She asked "are you going to take me to Teresa house?" I said "not today".  Then she said in her small little voice "are you our mommy?"  I said "you can call me mom if you want."  Little M said "okay lets go see Teresa".  I said "Guess what?" she looked up at me I said "Do you like baby ducks?" and she said shook her head "no", I said "do you like rabbits?" and she shook her head "no".  I though OH NO!! but then again this little one is only 4.  I said "do you like kitty cats?" she shook her head "no".  I got to find something she liked so I continued on the same thing with chickens and doggie.  The same answer was "no".

Little K who is 5 got on the other side and held my hand.  She looked up at me with this huge toothless smile that is so cute.  I told her she was so pretty and I was so glad they are here! She said "mom can we go see our room?' I said we will in just a bit.  She said that Miss J is crying really bad. I told her she will be okay.

Just this introduction alone -- I knew these kids need to be with me! They were so broken and so scared and all I could think was to gather them around me and comfort them as much as I could.  The Lord knows regardless of what other people think about us doing this.  I have tons of people who encourage us but those who don't I tend to get very upset because they have know idea what you could mean to other children.

Miss J who is 13 years old was still in the van crying.  She wouldn't look at anyone.  We gave her some space and let her be alone.  I went in the house and got her a warm wash rag to wipe her make up that smeared all over because of her tears.  She sat in the van for about 45 minutes.  Finally I went up to her and told her it was going to be okay.  I could only imagine what was going through her mind as this was the third foster placement she had been in.  I told her lets go to the house and she can be in the room alone if she wants. 

Once we were in the house I took her to the room and let her call her grandmother.  This was at the state workers request.  She gladly called her and cried and cried to her grandmother.  I felt horrible! There was nothing I could do at that moment.  She didn't want me.  She wanted to go back to her aunt where they were just taken from moments ago.  I let them talk for several minutes.  After about 30 minutes I went in and got my phone.  She was curled up in a fetal like position on the bed crying.  About an hour later I went in and she was sound asleep so I closed the door and let her sleep.

I decided to go through the bag of clothes that was brought in with the kids.  The whole bag was for the two little girls.  Not one stitch of clothing was for Miss J.  The only clothes she had was the ones she was wearing. I had a little panic attack! We found out yesterday it was a 100% that they were be with us so financially we had no warning and we were going to the coast tomorrow.  She little short shorts were not gonna cut it for the coast.  After discussing it with the state worker they decided to give me a clothing voucher.  I would have to go cloth shopping with Miss J within the next hour.  How was that gonna work?  She had been at the house for about 3 hours at this point and I really don't even know what she looks like. 

I decided to go in and wake her up.  I went in and said "Miss J I have to ask of you something that is going to be very hard right now.  You have no clothes at all.  Nothing has been packed for you.  We are going to get some clothes so we can have them before we leave for Family Camp tomorrow."  She said in a small voice "okay - can you give me a minute?"  I said "sure".  I walked out and my heart was so warmed by that little soft response from her.  About 10 minutes later I told her it was time to go.  But before leaving I needed to introduce her to the rest of the family. She gave her sweet smile and her little delicate laugh and she said "nice to meet you".  I could tell -- this girl is so so so broken and so torn up inside.  Lord please heal her.

Once we got in the van Alicia of course just started talking and talking.  It is something she does so well.  She is so random and just talked about anything.  If she doesn't have anything to talk about she will think of something -- anything. 

I asked Miss J if she went to church anywhere.  She told me she grew up in church.  I said "really?????" I was so excited! She did say that when she went to live with her aunt she stopped going because they did not go.  But she was so excited to be going back.  The Lord is so GOOD to us!!! He leads us to these kids that love going to church.  That is a battle we won't have to deal with and I am so thankful.

From that point on for the rest of the night it was okay and the ice had been broke.  Between little ones telling me to "talk to the hand" Whatever" when they are being addressed, pottied pants, laughing screaming, telling me "no, they are NOT going to do something and me pointing them in the other direction with them staring dart eyes at me and just about everything else.....it was an okay day.  

The little ones were in bed by 7:00pm and asleep by 7:30pm.  WOW that was an accomplishment! Miss J, Alicia, Nemo and Josh were in bed by 9:00pm.  Whew!! Now I needed to pack for tomorrow for family camp and to prepare my self for an active day tomorrow.